Women Voice: Why Other Women are not Married and How to Avoid Being Single


It is sad to see a lot of women in general dying before getting married and some in fourtys but still swimming in the ocean of singleness. This does not mean that they do not want to be married but there are various factors behind all these. What kind of parents will ever wish to see their daughter being single at every ripe age of 25, 30, or 35?

However, some go on to blame men that their inability to get married at a proper time is responsible for this trend. While some say that women are outnumbering men. Some even go further to say that men always look for beautiful women to marry. Of course, some do, yes! But we have to know that all women are beautiful it just depends on how you take care of yourself and you will also surprised to see these so-called ugly women are in stable marriages while the beautiful ones crying out there.

However, after a research I have found many reasons of why a lot of women are not married.

The first reason I came across was that of material expectations. Women of nowadays prefer to get married by a rich man with big mansion, driving a Mercedes Benz and a Blackberry in his hand. Since some of them are educated, they believe that they should find someone of their status. However, if we go around, we will find that rich men are quite few and when these women spend time to look for this kind of men, it is at the same time they increase the rate of singleness in the society. So, all women who base their research on material expectations their chances are quite low and it is likely they will die without tasting the sweetness of marriage.

Lack of respect is another reason why we have a lot of single women in Malawi. Other women are disrespectful. They do stand in the streets and talk things that they are not supposed to. For instance, you may hear someone saying, “You are not my type, I can’t get married with you.” These kinds of things are what damage your character and at the same time, you lose a respect as a woman. Moreover, it is not obligatory that you should be in a relationship with every man you meet but there are a lot of ways you can show that you don’t like them than using such offensive words. And, this reminds of what Deborah Nyangulu-Chipofya of Sunday Times also wrote in her Column This World of Mine on November 28, 2010 where she said: “If a man asks you out and you are not interested, simply say so and don’t attack the man’s weakness or tell him that he is bad looking or poor.”

Another reason, which women should take into consideration, is dressing. Dressing means a lot to men, as they do not like dirty women. It gives the reflection of your behavior and character. Nevertheless, in this world of democracy with the right of undressing in place, you will find other women in the streets walking naked with breasts and thighs outside and yet they want to be sexy and find a man to marry them. Oh, damn! What kind of a man will like to take things that are being heated by the sun everyday? A man needs a well-dressed and smart woman and they do not go for those who dress like a prostitute. Of course, other one-off men will come to you, get what they want, then throw you away and at the end you have only two options, whether to remain single or to become a public property. So be careful with your dressing.

Another thing that women must know is that there is no Mr Perfect. Therefore, if there are some who still go around searching for a perfect man, then they have a reason why they are still single because they will not get a 100% perfect man in the whole world. Of course, he may come one day but probably you may not be there at that time.

Now, let me wind up with another reason, which I think is worthy to be mentioned here – lack of smile. I know some may take this for granted but believe me, smiling is another key factor which attracts men. Men like smiling ladies and it is a tool which doesn’t not cost you anything. You have to know that apart from your physically appearance, smile is important as no matter how beautiful you can be, if you don’t smile, you are likely to be shunned away from men.


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